These last two months have been rough, not having hit my goal weight STILL and having modified workouts because of stupid people have really taken their toll on my brain, heart, spirit and motivation. So today, I am trying to focus on all of the positive things that are still happening, in an effort to get my own head back on straight and stay on this path that I am almost at the end of! No, not the end of – the end of this weight LOSS path perhaps, but once I hit the end of that path, it will be time to take new fork in the road, one of maintaining my weight, building strength – both physical and mental – and continuing to challenge myself. And if I can inspire someone else to make the commitment to themselves, well then that’s even better.
So these last 5 pounds are pissing me off, and I need to remember the non-scale victories that are out there – for instance, I no longer have to wear a suit of armor for a sports bra! Just a plain old boring normal sports bra now. And those stairs that kicked my ass two years ago, well I kicked theirs this time!
I have also FINALLY been cleared to start introducing more exercises back into my work out -started with planks last week, going to try burpees, mountain climbers and other exercises that use a tire, next week push-ups and you get the idea.
Per my doctor, this could be an injury that never goes away, it could be something that I have to deal with the rest of my life. What a literal pain in the neck! But I am making the decision that I will not let it get the best of me, I will do everything I can to ignore it, and just listen to my body. If I am having a sore day, I won’t do something to exacerbate the problem, but I can’t let the split second decision of one stupid person change my life forever. She has already screwed up the last two months, I can’t give her anymore of my time.
Another thing that has been difficult to deal with are all the saboteurs in the world, the people who just don’t get it, and will not support you for whatever reason. Some people say the haters are jealous, and maybe that’s the whole problem. Maybe it is, but I can’t let them get to me, the skin is growing thicker over here, and proving people wrong is a good motivator. Accepting that people are either jealous or just negative isn’t easy, I tend to be a positive person, always looking for the bright side, and I just don’t get that kind of behavior. To quote Taylor Swift: And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, I shake it off, I shake it off.
There have been a few things that have been helping me keep my head up through everything though. One is looking at far how I have come. I look at pictures of my progression and shock myself! I refuse to let myself go back to where I was, it is not going to happen and I looking at the comparison is really a strong motivator! I have come so far, I can’t let the haters and stupid people or the scale get me down!
Another key thing that has helped me has been having an incredible support system made up of incredible family and friends who cheer me on every step of the way! Really, I can’t stress how important this has been. Knowing that if I have a rough day that there are people I can talk to, that my husband is waiting when I get home at the end of the day, that I have girlfriends who I can just relax and be myself with, no matter who I am that day is invaluable. You honestly can not put a price on how much that is worth.
So yes, this journey is not an easy one, and getting frustrated and giving up would be much easier than plugging along and working towards my goals. Dealing with people who want to see you fail sucks, but I have to believe in myself and believe that I am better than that. I am trying to focus on the positive, I am trying to look at all of the good things that this journey has brought me, and to keep looking ahead to all of the good things that are going to come my way.
And trust me, when I hit that goal weight, there is going to be a party! Because I have earned it, through sweat, tears, discipline and tenacity. So stay tuned, it’s coming, and it’s coming soon!